The Joke Was On Me

A funny moment happened last night in our couples small group at church. We were playing "Two Truths and a Lie" to get our momentum going. Don't know that one? You simply come up with three statements, two of which are truths, one which is a lie, and you say them to the group. Their job is to discern which is the lie. You know, you really could have gotten that from the title, if you tried.

Anyway, what started out as an icebreaker for a few minutes fast became a 45 minute session of laughing and sharing. While that was great, hang with me, 'cuz that wasn't the funny moment.

When it came to the Covak's turn, Craig spoke our three statements. Now, picking him is strategic in itself since it's nearly impossible to read his face - makes the poker pots plentiful while opponents try to spot a tell, don't you know. Our three statements were:

• We are legally licensed to marry and bury.
• I knew Candice was my wife the first time I met her.
• Our first major conflict was about Candice deciding to keep her maiden name.

Can you spot the lie?

That's the best part, see - figuring out if what you think about a person or, in this case, a couple is accurate or if you're just spittin' bark on an old tree. 

Yeah, that's what I said. 

But that's not the funny moment, either. 

Yes! I am getting to it!

Just in case you're wondering, we are legally licensed to perform marriages and funerals. Craig did know I was his wife upon our first handshake - my wedding present from him was his journal from 1994 with a ribbon marking the date of this entry: "Today, I met my wife." Same date we met. Still have that journal. But never in a million years would it occur to me to keep my maiden name, largely for three reasons. One, a husband's name is his first and most auspicious gift (I wear it with great pride to signify I belong to Craig). Two, my daddy would take me to task for even thinking about refusing to surrender his name for my man's. And, three, my married name is better. Yeah, if you think that's vain you don't know me all that well. For that matter, you must not know my maiden name, either, or you'd be celebrating how I married up to a quite cool Jane Hancock.

Yes, still digressing.

So, what was the funny moment? Yes, yes...if you stay with me long enough, I'm told I always come back to point. Here it is: no one (and I mean no one) thought #3 was a lie. (They all voted #2 as the lie, for the record). And I think that's funny. Hysterical.

They all thought I'd for sure battle for "my independence" and "identity", as they put it.You want to keep your independence and identity? Be lonely forever. Reshaping both of those is what's brought me probably the greatest joy of my life. Ironically, there was a time when I neither wanted to marry nor have children. I never would have taken a man's name even if I did marry him, and I would have told you the reasons were because a woman shouldn't surrender her independence and identity. Guess the group wasn't that far off, after all.

But that was all before I met them. Two "guys." My guy on earth (here, here to being Mrs. Candice Covak) and my Guy in Heaven. They both changed me. Remade me. And now #3 is the lie.

Huh. 

If I weren't so blissfully happy, I might say I guess the joke was on me.