My new favorite song is "Someday" by Rob Thomas. One quick line in this song says, "Man, it's good to be someone." Which begs the question, "Who am I?"
Yesterday, our everyday reality shifted. We learned that our 27 days of waiting for God to answer our cry for David's life had come to an end. Recovery teams have located and extracted the remains of our beloved friend. I understand that, eventually, they'll make their way to Colorado. And that's necessary for those he left behind - his wife, Renee, and their two little boys, especially. I also understand that David's not coming home...he's already there. I don't know when he went so I don't know how long he's been there. I don't know how that worked or where, and I certainly don't know why. But I know that waiting season is over. He answered.
A reply of "No" from God is the hardest you'll ever hear. I've heard it before. I'll hear it again. God hasn't changed, and He ain't gonna'. So who am I going to be in the face of His "No"? I'm the someone who's going to say, "Okay. That's it. I believed. I let him go. And now I'm about the business of the living and the loving of his wife and sons. Of our friends. Of our own kids. Of one another." I'm the someone who declines the urge to hang onto the demands of this world...you can't take in the things you have here, anyway. I'm the someone who stands and worships a God I don't understand in favor of a plan I will accept. I'm the someone who believes in a God I can't see who tells me He owes me no explanations. I'm the someone who lives His truth out loud...mountain or valley - it doesn't matter. I'm the someone who's asking, "If faith is all you've got, will it be enough?"
Last night, my brother asked me, "How can you believe in a God who doesn't answer your 'why'?" My response was, "How can you not?" When my head hit the pillow, I was comforted. I don't want to have it all in my palm: I'd rather He keep it in His. I'm the someone who says that... and believes it.
Man, it's good to be someone.
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